President Pardons Benedict Arnold

Disclosure – It’s a joke?
President Trump Will Correct the Record of Benedict Arnold

In the early years of the American Revolutionary war, Benedict Arnold was a brilliant military general who helped win many important victories against the British, However, in 1779 he helped hatch a scheme to give up the American post at West Point in New York for money and a command in the British army. The plan was foiled, and Arnold escaped to the British lines. He was never captured and tried for the betrayal of his country, but since then his name has been synonymous with traitor.

President Trump announced yesterday that he would use his powers as President to correct the grave injustice inflicted on Arnold by the American government and historians. He insisted that Arnold’s record as a general was unparalleled in American military history and that Arnold’s grossly unfair treatment by the American government was a disgrace and justified the general’s decision to turn against his county. “Some very bad people conspired to besmirch this good general’s record the same way that some very bad people have hounded me in witch hunt after witch hunt” the President said. “The general made a perfect decision and the right decision, and I will order all government records be altered to correct the disgraceful and vengeful attacks on this great American hero’s good reputation.”

The President said he had sent a letter to the Departments of Defense ordering them to implement his plan and went on to say that Attorney General Barr had told him that he would take immediate action to enforce the order. Before the President stepped away from the podium, he said he would be looking at several candidates and would pick one soon to take the place of Benedict Arnold as the most reviled military officer in American history. The most immediate effect of that announcement is that 35 generals and 27 admirals have submitted their resignations to Congress. Furthermore, the faces on the statues of several American generals, including that of Grant, Eisenhower and McArthur have exhibited worried looks.

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2 Responses to President Pardons Benedict Arnold

  1. Joseph West Drewry says:

    Sure sounds like something Trump would do.


  2. bobillweaver says:

    And probably get away with it, Joe.


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